As I flipped on the television to accompany my hotel workout, Alice in Wonderland was starting. How appropriate. Alice was getting proposed to, but then she decided to follow the rabbit down the hole instead. I think that sums up everything pretty well right now. I am living my conventional Western lifestyle on a beautiful ranch, perfect San Diego weather, fantastic owners of the ranch (the best!), super thoughtful clients (superb!), abundance of everything material, and I decide to do what? Go down the rabbit hole in India? Well, the good news is Gurudev is in the rabbit hole.
Spent 48 hours really wrestling with my ego on the final decision. If I was a horse tied up to a hitching rail, I was sitting down and pulling back. The funny thing is when horses break the rope, they only have freedom for a moment, until someone catches them and ties them back up. I was realizing that returning to Utopia still wouldn't satisfy my internal answers.
After asking Gurudev permission to continue my internal process at the ashram (he agreed), a room several hundred yards down the road from the ashram for $20/month (not including electricity but ridiculously inexpensive by Indian standards...) manifested. Magic! I am investing $70 into constructing a bathroom with a shower head, basin, and western toilet, and faucet--making it luxurious. The good parts are the price, proximity to the ashram, and the view. We (Karn, the yoga instructor, is renting the other room) are on the edge of the city, so there is access to the parks and hills outside of our door. I must have done enough walking purification to warrant the location.
I will still be returning to San Diego next week, to extend my visa, sell horses, help sort out my clients next steps, animals relocated, and possessions/car put into storage (or sold), before returning to Jaipur for an open ended length of time. Not sure how long the sorting will take, no stress--it is all unfolding.
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