I arrived at the ashram later than usual and in more of a business mode. Curious to see what would happen, since this is more of the reality when I get home. When I sit alone in the area where Gurudev hangs out, I am probably cooking around 125 degrees, the minute he shows up--easily add five, six, seven hundred degrees or more. Ok, then I spent an hour of the three hours meditating in tears, because of the amazing sense of love and peace that radiates through his presence. Today, I felt like I touched into some new level or realization of what could be the future. Interesting to go from western business mindset to this in an hour and I am still in the same body. Obviously, I am limiting this as a regular state of being. Slow learner... What would it be like to have this amount of love and humility as a way of being in the world? It felt limitless, formless, no edges. Just some sort of formless being in a space bigger than an ocean--maybe a universe in size. I was aware of my body, but it somehow didn't restrict this sense of limitlessness. All of this in a lesson without a single word. He only commented about how many different sweets that I have experienced in India, while I was looking at the bowl of prashad, that graciously showed up. And yes, there was a sweet that I had not seen or tried, date wrapped around some sort of pistachio filling.
I had a little giggle that we are like mobile bags of plasma with assorted things floating in the plasma. Poor Gurudev sees all of these bags approaching, he sees what is in them, but we don't have a clue. He helps us put our bags through dialysis. He never runs off, refuses anyone's presence, always makes time to answer questions, be thoughtfully attends to all of our needs like we are his children (you experience more unconditional love then any human has offered, family or not), and lives in the world at large. Super Human!!!
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