|Giant sculpture under construction.|
What is truly under the scaffolding? As I sit in the "tree-like state of stillness." The inner screen is often experiencing fascinating energetic shifts, colors, sensations, and more while the outer world is ashram sounds and people shuffling by for pranam to Gurudev or the various Beings. Three screens to chose from while awake. Stuff only science fiction movies are made of? The nerve endings of my entire body are often activated when sitting for long periods of time--like baking in the oven? A new sensation and I am not complaining, just taking it all in as such a unique experience.
Questioning my longing for the One? Is it ego based because it is the "ultimate" end point or because I should or because my life appears to be headed in that direction or... I have such resistance to the spiritual/religious path, because of all the bad examples in the world. Once again, dishonesty is part of the mix, since many don't walk the talk. Sitting at Gurudev's feet has given me hope for the purity of spirituality in a living two-legged and a beacon to attune to. He graciously explained about gurus and their role in the path to God the other day which helped my resistance. There is never even a twinge of ego when he talks about these things which is comforting. People of all walks of life and statures come to see him and he is always the same kind, gentle, thoughtful being.
My self inquiry came up with the desire to know the Absolute Truth at the deepest level of submersion is why I am pursuing the One. In the meantime, learning all of this with Gurudev as the bus driver is beyond my adjective list.
|The elephants are one of my new favorite touchstones to the animal world. Magnificent animals.|