A small package arrived that contained photos of my genetic birth container. I have always looked like Gandolf in a family of Hobbits with my adoptive family. There is a uniqueness in viewing morphological structures that are familiar, but on other human beings: my ears, my chin, my nose, my legs, my head shape, etc. What was I expecting? I realized that I had none. After living 48 years without knowing, I didn't have it on the front burner, but it is fun. There was no twinge in my heart, because I don't really know these people. The point of acceptance appeared to be the twinge, but there was a sense of looking in the mirror at something familiar.
Now what? There was a lovely note included and a shared thought, "The journey is the goal." How lovely to have a birth container that consciously includes spirituality in the daily walk. More fun!
My adoptive mother and I will be meeting on Sunday to visit the gravesite of my adoptive father. My plan is to share this new connection, but I will see if it appropriate given our other focus. I want to share it in person and let her decide what to do with the information as I did with my birth parents.
As I have been untangling humility from worthiness it feels like the seat next to the driver. While absorbing the new presence of my birth parents, answers to a life of seeking horse training fundamentals, and growing Selfseeds feel like they are in the backseat of the bus.
Thank you for these beautiful words Bhavani:
"The cracks are "where the light comes through" according to Leonard Cohen's song...Humans have cracks...so that is part of the Divine Plan. Just as it does not matter if my voice is strained or I make a few mistakes on the piano, if Krishna wants to connect with someone who might otherwise be closed to "his" vibration, he needs me there to work through, cracks and all. Your cracks create humility, and that enables others to open to "you" and the Divine in ways they might not if you were Miss High and Mighty Perfection Personified!!! You do not need to THINK you are perfect to be the perfect one for these particular "jobs."
In fact, you are Perfection personified, because even the cracks are part of the whole. The Isha Unpanishad prayer speaks to exactly that. This is Perfect, that is Perfect. Take away from Perfection and Perfection remains.
Yes...they are overestimating what part YOU can play, but YOU are not doing anything...it is what is working THROUGH you doing anything at all. So, you can focus on your cracks and unworthiness if you want, but God doesn't see any of it. God simply perceives a being who is open to serving, and another in need...a perfect circuit for Power to flow through.
It is all the ego playing games with you. Imperfection is also perfection. It has "its reasons"."