Thursday, September 5, 2013

Inner And Outer Critic

As my desire to communicate with two-leggeds and not create lint or disturbances continues, I observe a moment in the contact while instructing people that humans often contract when they are observed.  The contraction appears to be some combination of inner and outer critic (ego) that gets involved with the process.  I have always viewed it as lint or mud or something that creates separation.  With the four-leggeds, their capacity for self reflection is less, so their moment of contraction is often perceived as more physical in nature until one gets to know the sensitivity of the unspoken world of animals.

This has become very evident while instructing friends, since I know them in a deep capacity and the momentary shift is quite noticeable.  As I continue to examine my own role in presentation, word choice, detail of sharing etc., I am starting to understand that the break isn't always on my side, so I just need to wait and keep my heart open.  Once again examining what happens in the gap can be very powerful.

The inner and outer critic is remarkable in its nature of creating a story.  As I need to prepare for formal dining on the upcoming cruise, I revisited the pain of dressing elegantly and stylishly.  Why am I more comfortable in my gym clothes with my stomach bare than fully, fashionably clothed?  After walking through so many fires of self examination, it has caught me by surprise to experience such a superficial, blind spot.  The spiral staircase three years later; I shouldn't be surprised that no stone is left unturned. Nice job inner and outer critic--the story from childhood.  How nice to take this belief system to the surrender pile.  Now I can have fun with the human game of dressing.  How fortunate that the closet full of clothes still fit without alteration.

(My recovery form the car accident continues to be an opportunity for deepening in so many ways. Really enjoying working with the Physical Therapist and learning cool insight into the body function on the physical level.  It is supporting my recent completion of the NASM Corrective Exercises Training. )

No comments: