Monday, August 26, 2013

My Life As The Limited Container

Thank you for the get well flowers!
Noticing how reentering an old lifestyle has limits.  Even if I am evolving, the perception of others can become a limit of sorts--a ceiling to bump up against.  Another mirror to examine one's self and blind spots? Do I want to grow beyond that perception or stay within it? Do I have a choice?

The opportunity to examine the nerve impulses for incontinence, paralysis, and loss of lower body function has been quite an opportunity to let go of more.  My car and body were the last two hold outs and they were removed for a short stretch of time.  I am fortunate to be recovering and will in principle do so fully, but the education and insight into wellness has been stunning.  Vulnerability, compassion for self, and assistance are remarkable to visit as a warrior.

The car is a total loss, but living "responsibly" has maintained a high credit rating, so a new car was easy. While going through the financial contract, a depth comparable to sitting at the ashram appeared.  The lender was spiritual and asking questions, I was sharing what I had learned from Gurudev, and we were both temporarily separated from the action at hand. One never knows when the veil is pulled back. Thank you for the lesson.

The desire to fly and move blindly forward into the unknown is calling and welcoming. Looking forward to New Zealand, Australia, and India.

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