10 Year Anniversary

 

10 years ago to the day, I walked out of the hotel in Jaipur and headed to the ashram. I was a day early from meeting with the group, but I wanted to know the route and distance, so I wouldn't be late. The walk one way was about 1 1/2 hours. The group was staying 10 minutes from the ashram. I had just landed from South Africa and was use to walking. Curiosity drove me. I was use to traveling, so walking through a foreign city was nothing new. Seeing cows on the street was. Somehow, I had created a map and was about to test it out. The sights, sounds, and smells were unfamiliar. By this time, I was searching/seeking answers for the pain in my spiritual heart. 

2021. First year to not go to India. Pandemic. Heading to Kentucky instead. I am not sure if I would return to India if I wasn't going to see Gurudev. Although, I have grown to embrace the differences and it feels like a second home.

Something pulling me to Kentucky not unlike the pull to India. Curiosity and gratitude for what is about to unfold. Takao has been babysitting a rug that I was given from the ashram. Maybe there will be a floor to keep it now. I have been thinking about Durga and all of the wonderful festivals I attended. Maybe I will find a picture to honor her. The house is going to be painted. I haven't had a wall to hang anything for a very long time. A student from over 15 years ago drew wonderful headshots of two past horses, both dead now. 

My first home. My real home is inside now, but it will be fun to play farmer for a bit. 

Watching the Evolution of Self

Watching the evolution of Self in a way that I could have never imagined before. India provided the catalyst for discovering it as a way of being. Now, it grows and becomes the way I am. Gratitude and beauty for this unfolding/deepening. As a drop, I am in the ocean, but the ocean is also within the drop. KY is becoming a catalyst for going home in a way that is filling a voracious appetite. To drink tea with nature, horses, and whoever comes through the gate. 

Nurturing the Gap

 

I have been looking at another way to be with the horses over the past few years. Studying through the eyes of the horse. Someone visiting the current group of five horses for the first time gave a voice to her experience of hand feeding grass trimmings.  It brought invaluable confirmation of the design that I want to continue pursuing. She observed their presence, kindness, and awareness. 

My focus has been on developing their intelligence, so they can make choices. It requires leaving a gap, so they can think and not just react. I have to be a better partner to nurture the gap. The gap is where a lot happens. I confirmed that while living/learning in India.