Big Fire For Holi Festival

People outline at the base to give an idea of the size of the fire.

Glow of the fire and the Guru.

Dancing flame

Inferno slowing down

Sun setting

Watching the big "flame" was like looking at Gurudev in his chair everyday--mesmerizing, glowing, and magnetic.

Wall Climbing As A New Addiction

So fortunate to have the fitness and stamina to explore the area.  No wild cobras or panthers yet.  I would rather see a panther than a cobra.  Photos often do not do justice to the view.

Extended Date

Birds on the jogging trail

Extended date May 28th for staying in Jaipur and utilizing the full 6 months allowed for the visa.  I will get to experience the heat. I have lived in very hot places before, so I am curious. The good news is, I won't be training horses in it. Thank you to the people in the US who help to make this possible.

Slot Machine Payoff?

When everything lines up on the slot machines, there is a payoff?  My physical, mental, and spiritual experiences are starting to align in one row instead of three different piles.  All of them are pointing to one place--my spiritual heart as the opening to all as Source.  Has every step of the design, for however many lifetimes, and in all planes of awareness led to this final inner knowing?  It makes sense now that everything is just experiences and we each are going to be triggered, nudged, knocked down, dusted off, encouraged, and so on in the way we need to evolve as a soul.  The mystical experiences are just interior training markers, the outer Earth Plan is obvious, and the mind is what we do with all of the information.  Experiencing such intensity in all three categories has been what has sent me to look for the innermost place of Self.  It is the zone of focus now--the state of inner silence and peace.  Lots of years and possible lifetimes of being distracted from this simple truth, so the habit to return to what is the Reality of what is always present will continue to take self discipline. Grace.

The morning's impulse was to walk to another temple I hadn't visited, but I walk by regularly.  The "spiritual" man with the robe who drives by me every morning on his motorcycle was sitting inside.  Coincidence?  We had a lovely talk about this latest piece that feels unshakeable in its simplicity and truth--Self as the zone from all directions.  He was encouraging about this latest point of clarity and spoke English well enough that we shared sentences instead of hand signals. Bonus!  A cup of tea was also included.  The white, woman, walking, and seeking has been an amazing part of the journey.  Another coincidence, he mentioned my animal heart as protection in the way Gurudev did a few days ago.  Fun!

Two new roommates. Bug patrol.  They make clicking sounds when they walk, (walking on walls and ceiling... Maybe they have tiny stilettos?)

Destiny Designs

Interesting to learn that we all enter with a design. Sounds like a fingerprint of who we are. Gurudev said there are very few who can read these destiny designs. Not sure I would want to know mine if I had a choice.

The source of truth is within man; he himself is the object of his realization.                         Bowl of Saki, March 12, by Hazrat Inayat Khan

Commentary by Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan: In point of fact truth is simple; it is man who makes it difficult for himself. For all other aspects of knowledge he has to get from outside, but truth is something which is within man himself. It is something which is nearest to us though we imagine it to be farthest; it is something which is within, though we imagine it to be outside; it is knowledge itself we want to acquire. Thus the seeker is engaged in a continual struggle: struggle with himself, struggle with others, and struggle with life. And at the end of the journey he always finds that he has traveled because it was his destiny to travel, and he discovers that his starting-point is the same as his final goal.    from  http://wahiduddin.net/mv2/VIIIa/VIIIa_4_12.htm Then the question arises: what is the way to attain the truth? Can it be attained through study? The answer is that the source of realizing the truth is within man. But man is the object of his realization. There are words of Hazrat 'Ali, saying that the one who knows himself truly knows God. Man, absorbed from morning till evening in his occupations which engage his every attention to the things of the earth and of self interest, remains intoxicated. Seldom there are moments in his life, brought about by pain or suffering, when he experiences a state of mind which can be called soberness. Hindus call this state of mind sat, which is a state of tranquility. Man then begins to become conscious of some part of his being which he finds to have almost covered his eyes. When we look at life from this point of view we find that an individual who claims to be a living being is not necessarily living a full life. It is only a realization of inner life which at every moment unveils the soul, and brings before man another aspect of life in which he finds fullness, a greater satisfaction, and a rest which gives true peace.    from  http://wahiduddin.net/mv2/VIII/VIII_2_7.htm Heaven is not a country or a continent; it is a state, a condition within oneself, only experienced when the rhythm is in perfect working order. If one knows this, one realizes that happiness is man's own property. Man is his own enemy: he seeks for happiness in the wrong direction and never finds it. It is a continual illusion. Man thinks, 'If I had this or that I should be happy for ever', and he never arrives at happiness because he pursues an illusion instead of the truth. Happiness is only to be found within, and when man tunes himself he finds all for which his soul yearns within himself.    from  http://wahiduddin.net/mv2/XIV/XIV_2_21.htm

Ego vs. Nature

“If you want to change the world, you have to change the metaphor.” —Joseph Campbell

Climbing Fortress Walls

Progress in the climbing fortress walls department. Three years ago, I couldn't complete this from the terror and today no sitting down or crawling! How fitting, not much on my to do list now.  Letting go of the construction of what I thought my future and life might look like. Felt an almost paralyzing desire to experience devotion at the purest level: sobbing, hard to breath, despair, and then a question of if my mind was playing tricks again.  "It is only thoughts separating me from my truth." Recalling this conversation created an immediate inner stillness. Nice try, but I am curious.  It is so beautiful to observe the state of true devotion.

(short video below)

 2:43

Daily Selfseed #140 Climbing Fortress Walls